Life and Love

Today happens to be Valentines Day so no surprise I'm thinking about love and what impact it has on my life. Today I feel truly loved by all my wonderful friends and of course my family who always makes it known that they love me unconditionally. I feel loved by life and the small blessings and favors it shows me every day: little things like a possibility for an internship, the beautiful snow a couple days ago, conversations with good friends that let you know everything will be all right.

But occasionally things catch me off guard... seeing someone unexpected that has hurt me in the past, far enough in the past that I feel I should be over it yet some how seeing them still makes my heart beat faster... realizing that someone who was in my life and such a significant part of my life just a year ago I don't even talk to anymore, and the feeling of loss, not necessarily lost love but just loss of one of the best friends I've ever had... not knowing when or how love like that will enter my life again... it's difficult, and it makes my heart hurt a little. But then I realize that for now I have all the love and support that I need (although more is always welcome, lol) thanks to the friends and family that help me keep it together on a daily basis.

On a different note, it feels weird being 22. 21 seemed like the age i would never get to much less ever get older than and now I'm 22 about to start my life outside of the protected world we call college. I'm scared and excited at the same time because I know that there are many challenges ahead of me but it's a new adventure and while usually that scares me, I believe I have become more adventurous lately and am ready for it.

That's enough for today, time to do some hw and not fail some tests.

new year, new me (now how many times have you heard that before?)

Last year at this time i never would have thought that I would be where I am now. I thought I would have left Denton, gone to law school or teach for america, but I'm still here working on getting another degree and looking for a full time job in the DFW area. In many, if not most, respects I'm glad that things have worked out the way they did. Had it not been for these unexpected turns in my life I would not have met some really amazing people that I now consider to be some of my closest friends. So the last 7-8 months of 2009 were pretty good to me.

2010. well it's the year I was supposed to graduate and I guess I will be a part of the class of 2009 and 2010 because thankfully I will be able to finish my second degree by may. People always make the same new years resolutions and I guess mine aren't really all that unique. But here they are: keep my act together and finish my last semester (no, really the last one this time); eat healthier, workout more (not necessarily to lose weight just to be a healthier me, cuz for once in my life I am actually happy with myself as I am which is a big accomplishment in and of itself). Really my goal is to stay on the same path that I have been on because since I have made some changes in my life, as of last spring, I have come leaps and bounds in the sense of just being happier in my life and my self, and I am very proud of that.

So that's my first post of the new year, hopefully more to come.